Thursday, December 06, 2007


A sex researcher says he's discovered how a man can find a perfect mate - by the size and shape of her boobs. "A woman's breasts denote a woman's character, just like her star sign," sexologist Piero Lorenzoni says. And to demonstrate his premise, the scientist has developed a chart using a variety of fruits to represent breasts. From melons to cherries, Lorenzoni said a woman's temperament can be charted just by matching the correct fruit to her chest size.

Melons -- Big-breasted gals whose bosoms resemble this fruit may appear to be the motherly type, but Lorenzoni says that assessment is way off base. "She likes eating and wants to be spoiled and admired," he said, "but seldom likes sex."

Lemons -- Happy-go-lucky girls who have these size breasts are "women who are full of life and can laugh at themselves," claimed the expert. "They want a balanced life without surprises."

Pineapples -- If you're looking for a brainy honey who'll stick with you through thick and thin, Lorenzoni suggest: "A woman with pineapple breasts is intelligent, often has a career but is still romantic. They are also faithful. Whoever wins their heart will not lose it quickly."

Grapefruits -- Boobs this size could be giving off the wrong signal if a guy is looking for a sex goddess. "This woman may look erotic, but is reality she's bashful," Lorenzoni explained. "She spoils her partner but prefers tenderness over sex."

Oranges -- Another lady who's all talk and no action is one with a bosom the shape of this fruit. "While she's self-confident, she has little interest in sex," said the researcher. "She likes conversation and friendship."

Pears -- This shaped woman is a pure romantic. "She loves love in all its variations," Lorenzoni proclaimed. "They can be very religious, but nonetheless pear women are famous for their steamy affairs."

Cherries -- Girls with petite breasts like this fruit are the most fun, according to Lorenzoni. "They're fun and very exciting," he said. If you want life to be a bowl of cherries, then this is your gal.
I just Blinded you with Science.


benson said...

So many cheap boob jokes come to mind...oh, nevermind.

Great bit...made me laugh. Can't wait to share it with Kathy (pears)

Still laughing trying to visualize pineapple boobs...and hearing Rupert Holmes in my head "If you like Pina Coladas..."

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