I'm gonna take the dog pills.

New data suggests that 30% of American DOGS are overweight. O.K. I "buy" those numbers. 30% sounds reasonable. I've seen the "diet" dog food on sale at the store. I didn't buy it - I have a cat - a really fat cat. I might have bought diet cat food had I seen it - I simply didn't - my cat seems happy the way she is - bloated and looking like Gil Gerrard.

Point it: Pfizer has just been blessed by the FDA for SLENTROL. This is a fat dog pill. SLENTROL will apparently help Bowser absorb fat and reduce his appetite. Bowser in turn, will watch with amazement as the fat just "falls off."

Look the the television ads for SLENTROL to commence any day. They'll look like all the drug ads, but these will end differently.

"Have your dog ask it's Veterinarian if SLENTROL is right for him."

or- "Ask your dogs Veterinarian if SLENTROL is right for your non speaking dog." or- Being that you're fatter than your dog, "Ask your dogs veterinarian, if you might be able to benefit from SLENTROL." or- Ask your Veterinarian AND your Doctor who & what might be able to take this dog pill SLENTROL." or- Ask your fat Doctor "If he'd take it."

I'm giving it to my cat and I'm not asking anyone. Then, I'll pop a couple. What the hell?