I can't believe it's not Fabio

So you think you're havin' a bad day? Not as bad a day as Fabio. You know, Fabio, the 6 pack abs - shirtless hunk from the romance novel covers. Fabio was just fired from his "I can't believe it's not Butter" gig. Fab-man had been the commercial spokeshunk for ICBINB for the last several years. When asked to comment Fabio said, "I can't believe I got fired from I can't Believe it's not Butter." Believe it Fabio. "It's hard to believe that it is not butter and that I will not be pitching I can't Believe it's not Butter." Fabio. Is it just me - or does he look kinda dumb? He looks like he's gotten by on his looks his whole life - and that he indeed doesn't know the difference between whipped oil & water & fresh creamery butter. Only a dolt of Fabio magnitude wouldn't know the difference. That's what made Fabio the perfect spokeshunk for ICBINB. Who will be next to pitch the yellow tubs?

I'd like to get the chance. I will promote ICBINB for a fraction of the cost of Fabio. If necessary, I'll even do the TV commercials shirtless. Maybe that's part of their marketing strategy. Man boobs. Maybe they have polls that show buyers of margarine want it served by a shirtless man. I can be that man. Just one problem as I see it.

The minute I spoke, "Hi this is Brian Pierce for I can't Believe it's not Butter" - many viewers would immediately say, "No, I do believe it's butter." "Look at that guy, it's obviously Butter." The fact that it really isn't - makes a strong case for me to be named the new spokeshunk.